“Real” definitions of stock market jargons

So you aced the stock market vocabulary quiz, huh?

Are you sure you know what stock market jargons and terminologies really mean?

Read on to see how Ron Nathan of Philippine Daily Inquirer’s Mr. BearBull column put a different spin on some stock market-related terminologies.

Warning: Brain processing not required. Laugh when the need arises.

What Stock Market jargons really mean

Market correction : The day after you buy stocks

Momentum investing : Buying high and selling low

Value investing : Buying low and selling lower

Cash flow : The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet

P/E ratio : The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market crashes

Bull market : A random movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius

Bear market : A six- to 18-month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry and the husband gets no sex

Standard and Poor : Your life in a nutshell

Stock split : When your ex-wife and lawyer split all your assets between them

Happy investing!

Some more interesting and useful posts:

• Poll: Which type of stock trader are you?
• Window Dressing to push stocks up on PSE last trading day?
• Quiz: Test your stock market vocabulary (Part 1 of 2)
• Quiz: Test your stock market vocabulary (Part 2 of 2)

Topic keywords for this post:

• share market terms and definitions pdf
• stock market terms and definitions pdf
• stock market terms for kids
• stock market philippines terminologies
• Glossary of Stock Market Terms & Definitions pdf
• stock market terms
• stock market trading jargons philippines