Funny, odd news this Christmas

James Ryan Jonas

It’s Christmas time now but that doesn’t stop people from making weird or absurd things. Here’s a collection of funny and odd stories related to Christmas that we spotted on several news websites.
Enjoy the holidays and enjoy these holiday stories!
#1 – Thieves steal Noche Buena Christmas food

Three men held up a Goldilocks store in Pasig City just before closing time on Christmas Eve, taking with them not only cash and personal belongings of the victims, but also a large box of puto, a type of rice cake considered to be one of the store’s specialties.
In a separate incident, a taxi cab driver ran away with a lechon (roast pig) that was supposed to be delivered to a house in Quezon City on December 24.
A waiter at a restaurant at The Fort complex in Taguig City hired a taxi to deliver the roasted suckling pig. When he temporarily got off the cab to ask people for directions, the taxi driver allegedly sped away hastily, taking with him the lechon worth about P4,000 ($95).
I hope they get stomach aches for eating those stolen foods!
#2 – Christmas trees banned in this Chinese city
The Chinese city of Zhuhai, located directly across from the gambling haven of Macau, has banned Christmas trees from shopping malls, restaurants and other public places because they supposedly pose a fire hazard.
The mayor of the city ordered restaurants, malls, grocery stores and other entertainment venues to remove trees and other “flammable decorations” immediately, apparently as part of a campaign to boost fire-prevention standards.
Reminiscent of the movie “How the Grinch Stole Christmas”?
#3 – Kyrgyzstan is the new land of Santa Claus

In a bid to revive its flailing economy, the small ex-Soviet state of Kyrgyzstan has declared itself the new home of Santa Claus.
They named a mountain peak after Santa and declared 2008 “The Year of Santa Claus”.
“Its slogan will be “Kyrgyzstan is the land of Santa Clauses”, said a tourism authority spokesperson.
In most Western countries, Santa Claus is thought to live at the North Pole or in Finland. However, Kyrgyz officials said he would have a more efficient delivery route on his traditional Christmas Eve trips if he were located in Central Asia and started westwards.
“He can eliminate time-consuming detours and avoid subjecting his reindeer to undue strain,” according to Swedish engineering firm Sweco who used geography and demographics to determine the ideal spot for Santa’s global toy delivery hub.
Ho! Ho! Ho!
#4 – Mexican fails to fly home this Christmas over bomb joke
A Mexican tourist was the latest casualty of the Philippines’ “No bomb jokes at airports” rule when he was arrested on Christmas Eve for joking that he had a bomb in his carry-on bag.
The 37-year-old tourist was excluded from his Philippine Airlines flight to Los Angeles after he joked on a pre-boarding security check that “There’s a bomb in my bag.”
He is said to be the ninth to be arrested and barred from leaving Manila this year because of joking about bombs at the airport.
A bombastic and explosive Christmas to all of you!

James Ryan Jonas teaches business management, investments, and entrepreneurship at the University of the Philippines (UP). He is also the Executive Director of UP Provident Fund Inc., managing and investing P3.2 Billion ($56.4 Million) worth of retirement funds on behalf of thousands of UP employees.