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3 years Long Distance Relationship (LDR) -- worth keeping?

emel · 39 · 7458

emel

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Sapat na ba ang pagmamahal, sakripisyo at pagttyaga para ipagpatuloy pa ang 3 years LDR relationship?
Saang point dapat iconsider ang salitang  "nakakapanghinayang"
« Last Edit: Jun 16, 2014, 01:07 AM by FutureGizmo »


vicces

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Reply #1 on: Jun 15, 2014, 08:31 PM
sa simula pa lang LDR na kayo? wala bang paraan para tapusin na ang "long distance" at ang ipagpapatuloy na lang e yung "relationship"? yun tipong isa sa inyo ang lilipat o susunod dun sa isa, para magkasama na kayo?

personally parang hindi ko kaya yung ganyan, not in the long term... hintayin mo si singkit o si katkatmachine, makakarelate yun sayo.. ;)


emel

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Reply #2 on: Jun 15, 2014, 08:39 PM
sa simula pa lang LDR na kayo? wala bang paraan para tapusin na ang "long distance" at ang ipagpapatuloy na lang e yung "relationship"? yun tipong isa sa inyo ang lilipat o susunod dun sa isa, para magkasama na kayo?

meron naman @vicces actually lets say youve been together for 6months, and you had a vacation for 10days just to be with him/her. you invested time, effort, money, you sacrificed your work, you fought with your boss just to take that 10days off.
macoconsider ba un as a factor in keeping the relationship?


vicces

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Reply #3 on: Jun 15, 2014, 09:31 PM
:scratch: hirap ng tanong mo emel hehehe... kung mahal mo kasi yung tao, hindi ka dapat manghinayang, walang bilangan kumbaga. ibibigay mo lang kasi mahal mo diba, kahit magastos o malagay ka sa alanganin... At hindi mo naman ginawa yun para sa kanya lang, kundi para sa sarili mo rin.

ang sinasabi ko naman e yung permanent na kayong magkasama (or same country code man lang), hindi yung mga short visits or vacations lang..

worth to keep the relationship? ako, if the person is worth it, then I will do my best to make it work, even if I end up with a broken heart. pero kung walang kwenta yung tao, then yun manghihinayang ka talaga sa sinacrifice mo..  so palagay ko, depende kung anong klase syang tao. yun lang, our feelings cloud our objectivity kaya di mo talaga masasabi, until its too late. :harhar:


jpm247

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The Sunk Cost Fallacy

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/how-the-sunk-cost-fallacy-makes-you-act-stupid.html

4. “I might as well continue dating someone bad for me because I’ve already invested so much in them.”


singkit_1588

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tanong..
til kelan ba kayo LDR??


emel

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Reply #6 on: Jun 16, 2014, 01:23 PM
:scratch: hirap ng tanong mo emel hehehe... kung mahal mo kasi yung tao, hindi ka dapat manghinayang, walang bilangan kumbaga. ibibigay mo lang kasi mahal mo diba, kahit magastos o malagay ka sa alanganin... At hindi mo naman ginawa yun para sa kanya lang, kundi para sa sarili mo rin.

ang sinasabi ko naman e yung permanent na kayong magkasama (or same country code man lang), hindi yung mga short visits or vacations lang..

worth to keep the relationship? ako, if the person is worth it, then I will do my best to make it work, even if I end up with a broken heart. pero kung walang kwenta yung tao, then yun manghihinayang ka talaga sa sinacrifice mo..  so palagay ko, depende kung anong klase syang tao. yun lang, our feelings cloud our objectivity kaya di mo talaga masasabi, until its too late. :harhar:

you are awesome! haha
malamang sasabihin mo rin na hindi kasama sa factor ung sasabihin ng ibang tao.
lalo na ang mga pamilya nio kung bakit mo ito hihiwalayan, o ipagpapatuloy pa. .... naranasan mo ba na maengaged sa relationship na hindi mo alam kung masaya ka pa o tanging panghihinayang na lang ang natitira?


emel

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The Sunk Cost Fallacy

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/how-the-sunk-cost-fallacy-makes-you-act-stupid.html

4. “I might as well continue dating someone bad for me because I’ve already invested so much in them.”

i so relate to this!!! eto yun e. eto ung bagay na kapag nasa sitwasyon ka  mismo, mahihirapan ka. i so love this article


emel

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tanong..
til kelan ba kayo LDR??

kung mag propose sya???
« Last Edit: Jun 16, 2014, 02:11 PM by emel »


singkit_1588

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kung mag propose sya???

need mo b ng assurance??

keep, if its worth to keep..



katkatmachine

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mag 4 years na kami ni labidabs na LDR, same sex relationship pa yan ha. :hihi:

keri lang samin ni labidabs ang LDR kasi nagsimula naman kami na magkalayo talaga. nagmeet lang kami online. landi ko, wahahahha. tapos umuwi siya dito sa pinas tapos nagmeet kami and ayun na, we fell in love. wahahaha. :D

sakin hindi ko na masyado iniisip ang distance, lagi naman kami magkachat sa skype eh, halos everyday.

dun sa sinabi niya "you invested time, effort, money, you sacrificed your work, you fought with your boss just to take that 10days off.
macoconsider ba un as a factor in keeping the relationship?"


sakin kasi nagawa ko ng lahat ng yan. pag umuuwi si labidabs dito sa pinas halos hindi ako pumapasok kasi yung time ko na kay labidabs lagi. wahahahaha. 10 days din yung leave ko kasi nagboracay kami. hahaha. ang laki na din ng nagagastos ko kasi nagpapadala din ako ng box kay labidabs dun sa UK, yung mga filipino food and stuff pinapadala ko dun sa UK. mas malaki pa nagagastos ko sa freight kesa sa mismong laman ng box.  :hihi: pati social life ko nasacrifice din kasi imbis na lumabas ako pagweekend with friends nasa bahay lang ako kachat si labidabs.

okay lang lahat yun sakin, super worth it kasi lab na lab ko si labidabs. makita ko lang siyang kinikilig sa efforts ko super happy na ako. ganun siguro talaga ang umiibig.  :hihi:

kung mahal mo talaga teh hindi ka na magdu-dwell sa negative. maging happy ka na lang kasi anjan siya. kahit malayo at least may someone pa rin na nanjan for you. kahit naman siya nahihirapan din pero di anjan pa rin siya diba, it means gusto niya pa rin magstay at itry iwork ang relationship niyo. yun na lang isipin mo. maging happy ka na lang.

pero kung ganyan na nagkuquestion ka na sa situation niyo, pati yung mga nainvest mo sa kanya ay binibilang mo na naku! mag-isip isip ka na teh kung gusto mo pa ba talaga yang LDR ninyo.

basta kami ni labidabs, we're in love.  :b_love:


jmces

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nakanaman kkm share ka naman ng mga secrets nyo :D

yang ldr or kahit anong relationship wala naman ata yan sa layo sa haba.... ng relasyon :D
kung masaya kayong pareho at mahal nyo ang isatisa okay na yun, pero kung pareho kayong di na masaya or one way lang at puro away at mas marami ang negatives kesa sa positives, baka kelngan na bitawan.


TSO

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Keep it or not? That depends on the person. If the person is too weak, then you're going to get broken not long after it becomes an LDR. But if you're initiating an LDR to begin with, and you're saying it'll take 3 years? That depends on how much you like the person and the level of effort you will exert to show that you want the other person. (Buti nalang posibleng isang taon lang ung sakin!!) Effort matters a lot, but so does spontaneity and quality of communication. It pays to travel a lot and have an active lifestyle, as it'll give you stories to tell. It'll also help to see each other at least twice a year, which helps keep the relationship fresh, especially if this is a commitment.

Now if you're in an LDR that's 3 years old, then again, you need to ask yourself how much you love the other person, and how you can be together with that person for good. Long distance is not supposed to be the end. It's a temporary state at best. You need to have some sort of plan to bring yourselves together, or there'll simply be no point in keeping the relationship.


singkit_1588

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Keep it or not? That depends on the person. If the person is too weak, then you're going to get broken not long after it becomes an LDR. But if you're initiating an LDR to begin with, and you're saying it'll take 3 years? That depends on how much you like the person and the level of effort you will exert to show that you want the other person. (Buti nalang posibleng isang taon lang ung sakin!!) Effort matters a lot, but so does spontaneity and quality of communication. It pays to travel a lot and have an active lifestyle, as it'll give you stories to tell. It'll also help to see each other at least twice a year, which helps keep the relationship fresh, especially if this is a commitment.

Now if you're in an LDR that's 3 years old, then again, you need to ask yourself how much you love the other person, and how you can be together with that person for good. Long distance is not supposed to be the end. It's a temporary state at best. You need to have some sort of plan to bring yourselves together, or there'll simply be no point in keeping the relationship.
wow.. nice post..
TSO posted in Love and relationship section..
:)


katkatmachine

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galing ni sir TSO! he summed it all up in just one post! thank you sir TSO. ang dami ko din naging realizations sa post mo.  :thankyou:


 


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